About six(ish) months ago, things in my world seemed to be going extremely well. Almost perfectly.
I’d settled nicely into my new freelance editing gig, I’d gotten more active in church and really started feeling at home there, I was making new friends (as a result of the church thing), our finances were looking good, my book sales were still slow-moving but would pick up with occasional promotions, and I couldn’t think of a single problem I needed to overcome.
Yet, I was stressed. Worried to the point of tears at times…without knowing the reason.
The Big Revelation
During a women’s conference back in October, I found myself completely overwhelmed with emotion. As the speaker talked about her own personal struggles and how God had brought her through, I fought the tears threatening to spill from my eyes.
She talked about her husband’s affair and how it turned her life completely upside-down. But it wasn’t that part of her story that got to me. It was something else.
For weeks before finding out about her husband’s betrayal, this woman could feel God preparing her for something. She didn’t know what at the time, but she had the strongest urge to dive deeper into God’s Word and really try to connect with Him on a more personal level.
And then she learned the reason for that prompting from the Holy Spirit: she would need His strength when her entire world fell apart.
Y’all, when I say this punched me right in the gut, I’m not lying. It was suddenly clear to me the reason I’d been so worried and emotional. I was afraid things were too perfect. Everything was going too well. Something was about to happen. I could feel it.
It was as if I was balancing the entire world in my hands and one wrong move would ruin everything. Without realizing it, I’d been waiting for the other shoe to drop, all the while clutching it as tightly as possible so as not to lose control.
As this realization hit me, I began to recall all the times God had been trying to tell me to let go and trust Him. There was the recent sermon from my pastor during which he implied that we’re all either going through something, have just gone through something….or…are about to go through something. Then there was the Sunday school lesson not long after with basically the same message.
And finally, this woman’s testimony at the conference.
So what happened next? Well, nothing for a while.
I did go home and contemplate this new insight, and I became more disciplined in making sure to spend time in Bible study and prayer every day. (Although, admittedly, it didn’t always happen - and still doesn’t - but I’m making an effort.)
And ya know what? It helped. I started to feel more at peace than I had in a while. I knew God was telling me to trust Him with the future even when I don’t know what it holds. So I’ve been trying to do exactly that.
It’s a good thing, too.
Because not long after that women’s conference, the crap hit the fan at my house. I won’t go into all the details here (not now, anyway), but there’s some serious stuff going on that could potentially impact my family’s financial future in a big way.
Don’t worry - we’re all OK physically. My marriage is fine; the kids are fine. So for those things, I’m grateful.
That said, the past few months have definitely been a struggle. There’s been stress like crazy, some arguing here and there, several tears, a lot of worry. But there’s also been much, much prayer. And a peace that surpasses all understanding...one that can only come from fully, completely trusting God.
Am I always perfect at trusting God? No. Of course not.
But I’ll tell you this: I’m able to trust Him so much more easily right now than I would’ve been able to if I hadn’t worked on my relationship with Him as a result of the things He revealed to me at that conference.
Trusting God: Bible Verses That Can Help
Through all the emotions and ups and downs of the past few months, there have been several Bible verses I’ve clung to over and over. I wanted to list them for you here, in case you’re in need of a little encouragement today.
“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” -Exodus 14:14
“In Your unfailing love You will lead the people You have redeemed. In Your strength You will guide them to Your dwelling.” -Exodus 12:13
“I call out to the Lord, and He answers me from His holy mountain. I lie down and sleep; I wake again because the Lord sustains me.” -Psalm 3:4-5
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” -Joshua 1:9
“The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know Your name trust in You, for You, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek You.” -Psalm 9:9-10
“The Lord is far from the wicked, but He hears the prayers of the righteous.” -Proverbs 15:29
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” -Proverbs 3:5-6
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” -Romans 15:13
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the Lord of all comfort. who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” -2 Corinthians 1:3-4
“The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8
Friends, I sincerely hope that these verses help encourage you and lift your spirit. No matter what you’re going through, how big or small it may seem, God’s right there with you. He’s just waiting for you to put your trust in Him and surrender your fears.